Monday, April 3, 2006

Cracked?

I think I may have finally cracked from the pressure.

I was up and down all night, worrying about work. Stupid shit like how the database creation commands are going to affect state management. And I was/am too exhausted to actually write the code (so it's not like I could have just stayed awake and done the work). I don't know how much I really slept last night.

Yesterday afternoon I sat at a teminal for two hours, and I think I wrote twenty lines of code.

I don't know what to do. One one hand I was unproductive most of the weekend, so I need to get my ass in gear and push through the remaining week of work. On the other hand I'm completely burned out and not sure even being at work is worth it.

I think I have to talk to Shamoun, but I don't know what to say. How could I ask for time off in the middle of this critical phase of the project? How much time do I need if I did ask? How can I turn and run when others are staying to fight?

Kyle called this morning. She is REALLY sick (whereas in my case it's all in my head). I feel a little bad since the last time I got food poisioning she came to my rescue and I obviously can't return the favor.

Need to shower and go to work.

Vikki called last night. She seems to have had a good time out with her friends for her birthday.

Ok, get up Devin. Get out of bed. Still laying here typing when I need to get up and shower. Get up!